5 Steps to Successful Online Dating
5 Steps to Successful Online Dating
Online Dating is on the rise. How can you use this dating method to your best advantage with your best foot forward?
There are several dating methods blind dates, classified ads, telephone personals, or even general grocery store pickup line dates or even the popular online dating. Each of the dating methods has its advantages and disadvantages.
Here I am going to focus on online dating. Here are five steps to successful online dating
Step 1) Specify What You Want
Decide what kind of dating or relationship you want to have
I hear you say, “What do you mean? What kind of relationship?. Dating is dating isn’t it?”. Well what I meant was, to define if you are looking for marriage-minded relationship, or long-term relationship without any marriage plans, or short-term casual dating ranging from few weeks to few months or even intimate encounters for very short-time frames such as days.
This step helps you identify what you are looking for. Why do you have to define what kind of dating or relationship you want? This way you can search for online dating sites based on your decision. There are several sites focusing on marriage minded and long term relationships. And then some, which focus on the relationships focused on casual, short term and intimate in nature
You can search on Internet search engines such as Google or Yahoo by searching with your criteria keywords within quotes such as “marriage minded dating” or “casual dating” or “intimate encounters” etc
Step 2) Select Your Dating Site
Browse each online dating site very carefully by looking at the profiles at each site and reading each profile what they are looking for in their dating partner. Some online dating sites will allow you to browse profiles without registering first. So you can use this opportunity to browse their dating profiles and assess whether that online dating site is your kind of place to hang around
A word of caution is that not all online dating sites are the same. Some are fancy. Some are quality. Some are cheap. Some are feature-rich. Some are free. Some are paid. But what matters most is for you to select the internet dating site based on what you want on Step 1) plus the features you find in each dating site which you feel will get you to whom you want to date
Step 3) Setup Your Amazing Profile
This is one of the key steps which a lot of people forget or don’t take the time to do it. Because they feel either they don’t have the time to write a detailed profile, or they think they are going to be contacting people anyway so why bother or they think what is the point etc.
Your profile is your first impression you give to a potential partner who maybe browsing that dating site when you have joined that particular dating site. When a potential partner is looking through profiles if they see an empty profile even without a picture, how could they get to know you when you don’t even present yourself let alone make ANY impression!?
So a completed profile is a must. A picture adds another thousand words to your profile. If you wish to remain anonymous in the beginning a dating profile without a picture is also ok. You can make up for it in your profile details. But please do have something in your profile without having just a single line like some people, which says “hot guy looking for a hot girl” or “are you cute? Then email me” or “sexy girl wants her cute boy friend” or “just looking”!. I even saw on one dating profile which said “oh I was lost .now I am found…let me out!”. Hmmm… if it is meant to be funny, at least make sure the sense of humor is easily understood.
Step 4) Using the Dating Site Features
As mentioned above, not all online dating sites have the same feature set. Depending on whether each dating site charges per month or whether they are free, what features they offer as part of their program will also differ
Most dating sites will allow you to post your profile for free. When you browse their existing profiles and you find a person you like to contact then most sites will not let you contact them unless you pay. If the site is a free site then they will most likely allow you to contact them.
Contacting the interested person maybe either via a “wink” or an “IM Instant Messenger” or an internal email via the site. Each of these features will be useful in their own right.
A quick and easy method to show your interest to the person you are interested is to send a “wink”‘. This way you don’t have to come up with your own ‘chat up line’ or other creative ways of getting their attention. The dating site will have predefined ‘winks’ setup so you just select one wink you like and then ‘voila!” your desired person will have got your ‘wink’.
Sometimes it is better to Instant Message a person especially if you find that person rarely comes “online” and you want to grab their attention when they are online which is quite unusual so you would like to say “hi”.
An email to the interested party is better because you can describe yourself better and plant a better ‘first impression’. The reason being if you “IM” a person and they reject you at that moment because they don’t know much about you, some sites may not allow you to contact that person again even by email. This will depend on the dating website’s sophistication of their features. Normally, you can contact that person by Instant Messaging and if they reject your IM, you can still email them.
If the online dating site you signed up is fortunate enough to have chat rooms, you can say hi in the chat room and then take the conversation to a private ‘whisper’ mode for more privacy to converse with that person in a more private setting
Step 5) Take Your Time To Get To Know
Some people who start on dating online rush into things which they later regret. It is critical that you get to know the other person very well before arranging an offline meeting in person
There are several reasons for this. Firstly, your only interaction with the person you just met on the dating site is thru Instant Message, Chat or Email or a combination of these. Sometimes you may have taken the conversation to a phone conversation by exchanging numbers or calling that person. On these mediums the other person can create quite a ‘make believe’ scenario and in the ‘heat of the moment’ of attraction with their features as they describe it, or their voice or their words might blind you from your normal logical thinking.
So it is very important to get to know them from all angles before committing to meet them in person. One of the best ways is to ask questions. Especially open ended questions. Whatever you do, do not assume anything about the other person. This is not fair on you because you are not telling yourself the truth, or the other person because you are misjudging them.
When you are ready to meet, choose a place to meet which you feel comfortable with. Be yourself, and enjoy the dating process. Best of all, have fun getting to know the other person. If it is not fun then it is not worth your time. Good Luck!
Joshua Danicio
http://www.articlesbase.com/dating-articles/5-steps-to-successful-online-dating-64122.html
Next step in online dating for a man over 50?
I am new to the online dating scene, it wasn’t around last time I was single. Was married for 23 years and divorced last year after the loss of a child destroyed the dynamics of our marriage. Being alone for the first time in a long time is not where I want to be but meeting someone with my work schedule and aversion to the bar scene has been difficult. I have tried a couple of the online dating sites and have managed to gain the interest of several women but they seldom want to meet in person. I don’t know if it is my technique, or lack thereof, or if they are just window shopping. I always make myself known to them prior to suggesting a meeting, I am a successful business owner, respected in the community, fairly handsome, fit, and well educated, not on any sex offender lists, etc. but the women I am attracted to seem to be more interested in collecting pen pals.
My 1st question is, how aggressive should I be in trying to get someone to meet in person?
Should I wait for a reply to a message before I send another?
Like I stated earlier, this is all new to me and I am not familiar with the protocol, if there is any.
Why would you even WANT to get into another relationship. Buy your self a dog for companionship.
you are just going to be miserable all over again.
References :
I’ve done this and it can work but, like anything on-line (semi anonymous) there’s a lot of losers out there too.
1. Don’t be too aggressive, while all women are different, I think being aggressive on-line doesn’t help much.
2. Yes, wait for a reply. You will appear too needy, aggressive or a cyber stalker. If she’s interested she’ll reply. Plenty of people are rude and simply blow you off.
There are plenty of men and women that are only into cyber relationships. They are too messed up in one way or another to deal with a real relationship. While it may entertain you, they rarely go anywhere.
I’m about your age and have done this on and off (mostly off) for awhile now. In my experience there are good people out there that, like you, are normal and need a way to meet. But there are trolls that are just there to screw with people and many that aren’t capable to have a relationship at least for a while.
People consider me above average in looks, athletic and smart. However, I see many women looking for a "prince" either directly stating so: Tall, very good looking, younger than them, high income, lots of free time, no kids, free with money… or implying it. I never look at what guys want but I’m amazed at how many women are looking for men younger then themselves. (I thought that was mostly a guy thing)
So if you get no reply – forget it. If they don’t want to meet – forget them. You will just waste time and become frustrated with women not looking for what you want or offer. If you want to converse endlessly with a cyber woman, fine, just don’t expect anything more.
Honestly, i’ve been out of any relationship for a couple years and am quite happy about it.
EDIT: One final word, do not make a "date" out of a 1st meeting. Meet for a coffee or a drink 1st, not longer than 45 mins. This gives both of you a way out and costs little, with no other expectations. Really quite common now.
References :
Hey, I’m sorry to hear that you lost a child and that seemed to hurt your marriage.
In response to your questions.
1. Generally, I would exchange about 3 or so e-mails and then move to a phone conversation. Keep the phone conversation fairly short (maybe about 20 minutes). If you two seem to have a good chemistry over the phone ask her out for coffee. Coffee are pretty safe and a lot of women are a little apprehensive about meeting men online, so I’ve found that coffee dates work the best.
2. Women get tons of e-mails on these dating sites. She might just not have even read your first message. After 3-4 days, if she hasn’t written back, send her something something short and funny like, "I haven’t heard back from you yet. I hope you’re not playing hard to get. We haven’t even met yet…"
I did online dating for about a year before I met my girlfriend, and this is the most effective system I’ve found for getting a girl’s attention and getting her out on a date.
I hope this helps.
References :
http://www.datingadvicefordudes.com/OnlineGame.php
all answers are nice except the 1st one. ( forget it)
U are new to online dating scene, so let me tell u some secrets about dating sites.
*some women are only interested in cyber relationship. they just want an online bf.
therefore, they never ever try to get off the computer and meet u in person.
(these women are usually ugly or mentally messed up ones)
*the prettier she is, the more emails she gets. if she is pretty u have more than 20 rivals who send her emails everyday.
she might skip reading ur emails that way.
*Never trust too good to be true model looking women on dating sites.
they are scammers. trust me. when u get close with her, she ask u to send her money for whatever the reason. better ask her to get on cam first.
*u should know that pics and cam are two VERY different things.
some ppl can look great in their pics but look horrible on cam and the other way round.
always ask them to get on cam first. never trust women’s glamour photos that are professionaly taken.
*Finally, u don’t nee dto be aggressive. that only scares every woman off.
relax and take ur time. do not rush into marriage.
just enjoy meeting new ppl and u will eventually find a great woman who is as smart as u.
good luck sir!
References :